"You
know, it's always easy to tell if a friendship
is good one or is bad. Because when a friendship
is good, you feel that you get more and more
energy from it. And when it's bad, you feel
very tired and sad because of it. Can you
think of any people in your life that always
take energy away from you? You see them, you
feel so good and you have so many exciting
things to tell them and.... and .... well
afterwards, you always seem to feel boring
and out of energy. You feel that nothing you
did was really that interesting. Somehow,
you feel poorer than you were before you saw
that person. It might be a teacher you don't
like or an aunt or uncle who always criticises
you.... Or it could be a friend who is jealous
of you, even though you don't realise it.
Do you know anyone like that? (Give them
a moment or two to think.) Who do you
know like that? (Directed towards someone
in whom the question has triggered a response.)
A
teacher? And what did he do?... Yes. I know
exactly what you mean. And anyone else know
someone like that? Yes... A friend?!?... Not
a very good friend! (If you get at least
3 or 4 recognition responses, put them into
groups where there is at least one person
with a story per group and get them to demonstrate
through a sketch they create exactly
how someone they know succeeds in deflating
other people. Then get them to perform these
for the rest of the group.
Well,
the worst thing about these people is that
they manage to make you feel bad, but usually
you don't really see how they do it.
Well, I'm going to show you one way
of making someone feel bad.
Here's
an easy formula to deflate people -
"Hi!
How's everything going?"
"All
right with me, but I'm afraid you're going
to have a rough time."
And
then you give the other person a list of things
they did that should make them feel guilty
or silly or ashamed.
Print
the following prompts on an A4 sheet of paper
which is either pink or blue (or any other
two colours) and paste them up at different
stations in the classroom, such that at every
station there has both a pink and blue sign.
Divide the group into two, with "pink"
and "blue" people. Have the students
meet a member of the other team at each of
the stations with both a pink and blue sign.
The pink person will make the pink reproach
to the blue person and the blue person will
make the blue reproach to the pink person.
An example might be:
"Hi!
How's everything going?"
"All
right with me, but I'm afraid you're going
to have a rough time. You went on
holiday and didn't send anyone a postcard
and everyone's mad at you!"
Possible
situations for the pink and blue posters:
- S/He
forgot to send anyone a postcard while on
holiday
- S/He
stepped on someone's foot while dancing
with them
- S/He
left a restaurant and forgot to pay
- S/He
offered to drive you somewhere and left
without you
- S/He
stayed at your home and left the place in
a mess
- S/He
has spilt food on clothes you loaned them
- S/He
went on holiday and took everyone's passports
with her/him
- S/He
took the family car without telling anyone
and everyone was left with no transport
- S/He
bought food for the group but overpaid 300%
- S/He
borrowed the family's mobile phone and dropped
it in a river
